I Drink
by ToTolerateAWorldOfDemons
Summary: Short fic about what was going through Regulus' head the night he died. Angsty. No flames please.


I Drink

I should have known that it would come to this in the end. My breath burns as it goes in and out of my body. Kreacher is crying loudly and that it the only sound besides my harsh breath. I'm so afraid. I wasn't a Gryffindor like Sirius. So its alright that I'm afraid. Its fine for a Slytherin like me.

I take another mouthful of the potion.

Sometimes I wonder what it would have been like if I had chosen Gryffindor instead. Not that I was ever all that brave. Maybe Ravenclaw would have been nice. And maybe then Sirius wouldn't have been mad at me my entire first year.

I laugh and it sounds more like a cough. I take another drink.

Sirius never did get over me being in Slytherin. "Come on Reg! You cant actually have fun in the dungeons with all those snakes!" He used to tease me. I would get so mad at him sometimes for it. I wonder why? It seemed to matter so much then.

I wonder what he would think of what I'm doing now. Not that he probably even thinks about me any more. The night I accepted the Dark Mark was the last night I ever saw him wasn't it. Before that he would sneak back into the house to see me but not after that.

I take another drink.

I still remember the way he looked at me that night. His eyes stared at me coldly and I felt shame like I've never felt before. "I'm sorry that it turned out this way Reg. Bye." Those were the last words I ever heard him say. But at that moment I truly believed that the Dark Lord's path was the one of truth. I should have listened to my brother. He was always looking out for me before that so why didn't I listen to him when it came to the Dark Lord?

I wish I could see Sirius again. I take another drink.

Oh, there's Sirius. What on earth is he doing here? Must be a hallucination. Merlin, my throat burns. "You're so fucking worthless Reg. But you were always like that huh? You weren't as brave as me. You weren't as good looking as me. So damn worthless." the Sirius hallucination says. He's staring at me with cold hatred. A look I had never seen on my brothers handsome face. Not even on the night I received the mark. I hate it.

I take another drink.

And then mother is behind Sirius with her wand. "No! Sirius behind you!" I try to warm him but mother shouts Crucio before I can call. Why am I so weak? Sirius is in pain and I cant reach him. All I can do is lay on this rock and watch my brother scream. Kreacher is forcing me to drink something while sobbing. I try to push him away but he forces the liquid down my throat.

I drink.

"Stop hurting him!" I scream at my mother. And now more people are coming foreword to torture Sirius. Death Eaters, father, my friends from school, the Dark Lord himself. "PLEASE LEAVE HIM ALONE!"

"Master Regulus, please d-drink this last bit. Kreacher needs master to drink just one last bit." Kreacher croaks from my side. He's holding a cup and that makes he happy because I'm so thirsty.

I drink.

My mouth is on fire. My throat and lungs are burning. I would do anything for water. Where did Sirius and the others go? Oh well. Sirius will find his way home. Right now I need water. "Water." There's water right over there. I can get to it if I crawl.

My body is so weak. My insides are on fire. The water is so close. Just a little farther. My bones feel like shattered glass. Just a little farther now. Kreacher is still crying. I wonder why? The water is so close now. Black and cool.

I drink.

I'm under the water now. There are people all around me. Biting and pulling me. The water is so cool. I remember what I was here for in the first place. I did it. I didn't stop even though I was scared. I wonder is my big brother would have been proud of me.

***End***

Authors note: So what'd ya think? This is my first Harry Potter fic and I'm rather happy with it. Oh, if you're confused with the hallucination bit, in the seventh book when Kreacher is telling the story of Regulus he says that when he drank the potion that he saw terrible things. When Dumbledore drank the potion he saw people he loved being hurt. So I figured Regulus would see the same. If you have any questions I'll be happy to answer them. Thank you for reading and please send a review. Just please no flames because…well…they're mean!


End file.
